I am, therefore …

I submit manuscripts.

While I continue to work on book three of my Winnie and the “Wizard” series, I’ve got a contemporary YA novel, Nickie Dorrin Believes, that has been sitting patiently on my laptop. This past mid-June, I submitted sample chapters to a publisher I met at a pitch session during a writer’s conference in May. Still no response.

These days, if a publisher isn’t interested, you get nothing to show for it, not even a form email. After a certain number of months, authors are expected to assume the publisher has moved on and would like you to do the same.

But I love Nickie! I want to see her in print.

A critiquer friend suggested that I submit my novel to my current publisher, The Wild Rose Press. They’re best known for romance novels, not a buddy story featuring two teen girls, with one in the early stages of developing a relationship with God.

On Friday, I wrote to my editor, Jo, and asked if the company might publish that kind of book. She replied that high religious content, and/or a conflict resolution relating to a higher power, would fit in the inspirational category, which they don’t publish.

Even with her description, I had to confess that I still wasn’t sure if my story counted as inspirational or not. I do worry, though, that my novel might be too religious for the secular market, yet too secular for the religious market. Where will poor Nickie fit?

Thankfully, Jo agreed to take a look at my synopsis and the manuscript. That was when I realized my synopsis and the novel’s ending needed work. I spent most of Saturday pacing and grumbling and wondering, “What’s wrong here and how can I fix it?” Something about the ending seemed amiss, but what?

I knew I couldn’t return to the novel’s original, more secular plot. But I also didn’t want to water down the spiritual parts.

In the end, I brought back some previously deleted dialog and added a scene I found in an old notes file that I’d never included. Finally, it clicked!

I attached the two requested documents and called out, “Doink!” as I hit send. That’s part of the process. If you don’t say, “doink” when you hit the send key, that invalidates the submission.

After pressing “send,” I experienced that exhilarating, top-of-the-rollercoaster hill, sensation that comes whenever I submit a novel to an editor. Next, came the uncertain “will they or won’t they accept it?” feeling.

Now, I wait in hopeful anticipation. Although, ten minutes after I post this essay, I could already have a rejection. If my submission does end that way, so be it. Someday I know I’ll get a yes. Because, like Nickie, I believe.